


What I didn't say.

by mallorysendings



Category: Beth Green and Daryl Dixon, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-02
Updated: 2014-12-02
Packaged: 2018-02-27 20:32:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2705813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mallorysendings/pseuds/mallorysendings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Beth's Funeral and Daryl in the Aftermath of her tragic end,</p>
            </blockquote>





	What I didn't say.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer!!!!!!!!!! Writing this tore my heart in two. Like seriously i am a puddle of emotions right now. This must be the acceptance part of the grieving process...Me writing her death. So if you can't handle the sad. The tragic. The PAIN..... then STOP. Go read my other HAPPY stories. But if you are ready for the hurt... read on. Just know. I am with you. I am so tore up.

Can’t deal… she said “have a little faith.” He had pie in the fuckin sky hopes. God was always just messing with him. Given him something an taken it away.

Gave him a family…a home. Governor took that. In the smoke and ashes he did not realize Beth being with him was a gift, something special and precious. Something he needed and wanted till she was gone. 

His legs ran till they could no longer support him. In agony of failure and losing her he was faced to realize losing her an being alone was the worst thing that ever happened. “Last man standin.” she said. Being the last wasn’t worth fighting for he realized. For the first time in his life he wanted to end it. But then there had been this glimmer, this fine flame of hope she was still alive, that her heart beating in her small chest. It is what kept him living. What made him fight. 

Seein Rick, Michonne and Carl that night restored his wavering faith. God hadn’t turned his back on him. She had still been out there somewhere unknown. Still a flame guiding him through. The hope of finding her got him through the horrors of Terminus and the streets of Atlanta. 

He told Carol that “she could start over.” He was trying, he wanted to start over with his bright flame once he found her again. They were close. So fuckin close. He could not wait to tell her… to see her. 

He wished he had been the one to meet her instead of Carol. He had been an idiot not stepping forward for Beth. Had he met her he would have left right out the doors with her behind Carol. But it all had gone so wrong. His hopes nothing but a splatter and a puddle on the floor beneath his snuffed out flame. He acted harshly. He didn’t give a damn anymore he wanted to lash out. He needed to take a life for the one taken from him. It would never be enough.

He was alone outside the little white cottage farm house, their family grieving and allowing him space. His candle in the darkness had been laid to rest at sunset and the dirt had been filled in leaving him empty and devoid of emotion as they all thought of the sunny girl with faith hope and love to share and how cruelly she had been snatched from them.  
Once darkness fell people headed inside. He was in the pitch black, thinking it ironic. Cold and Dark now without her. He stayed chewing his nail nervously, as he fought the tears that threatened to consume him again. Lying on his back beside the grave of the only woman he ever loved he spoke to her. 

“Want ya ta sing for me again.” He whispered to her cold grave. “I was an ass when I-“ his throat hitched. “You know when.” 

His hand dug into the dirt as he turned on his side to whisper to the mound as if to a lover. “You changed me….. But I needed you here to remind me of it sometimes.” His tears falling into the dark soil that surrounded her. “You were supposed ta live.” He groaned. His chest actually hurt and his stomach since the moment it happened had been unsettled.

“That night I play it over and over in my mind. I see your golden face in my mind.” He continued. “What would have happened had I ignored the sounds at the door?” he pressed his forehead against the clumped mounds wishing her grave would swallow him up too. He wanted nothing more than to remain beside her here for all time. 

“I’m sorry…” His nose ran slick with snot and he wiped at it smearing mud into his nose and upper lip. He nuzzled the ground wishing it was her neck and her pulse beating under it. “I can’t-“ he sobbed. “I need you here to tell me ta have faith….cause I lost it when I lost you.” 

He pushed his hand down. “I think I loved you.” He whispered praying she heard him. He needed her to know how he felt. Needed her ta understand that she was his light… His hope in this world where the dead walked the earth. “I love you Beth…” he whispered to her grave. It was all he had left. A cold grave and words to a saint. 

“Beth.”


End file.
